A Pocket Full of…Tissues

The past couple of weeks have been a blast. Of course, when I say ‘blast’, I mean whatever the exact opposite of that might be. It was shortly before Christmas that I found myself with a cold, thanks to some flip-flopping weather.

Around here, there really isn’t such a thing as autumn. We go from the blazing heat of summer to slightly less blazing heat and around December or early January, we leap headfirst into winter. As such, the seasonal sickness that used to affect me around September when I was in the US gets put off by a couple of months. Usually, I manage to make it through Christmas sneeze-free, but alas that wasn’t the case this time. So it was that I sniffled my way through Christmas.

But we weren’t done yet. My cold, it seems, came in two phases. The first phase involved a general sense of achiness all over my body, lethargy, loss of appetite and the occasional cough. The next phase, which began earlier this week, involves a leaky faucet of a nose, some richly layered sniffing sounds and a scratchy throat that leads to spasms of coughing. It’s an exciting process.

Hopefully, that’s the end of it and by next week, I’ll be as fit as a particularly robust fiddle. Or if there is another phase to all this, please let it involve telepathy and the power of flight rather than more runny noses.

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Hot and Cold

I’ve been kinda sick this past week. Needless to say, it sucks.

The combination of hot and humid weather, scalding water in the bathroom and a broken-down air conditioner really messed me up. Or maybe there’s just a virus going around. I prefer to blame the weather, since it’s terrible. Summer’s only just begun though, so this just the tip of the sand dune when it comes to heat waves.

Probably the worst part about being sick is that point where it feels like I might be sick forever. Deep down, I know that’s not true. I’ve had colds before, I’ll have them again. But there is that low point of having a cold, the nadir of sickness, if you will, where it seems like this is it. I’m going to be sniffling and coughing and sneezing for the rest of my life, my head always feeling like it’s been stuffed with glue.

Trying to work out with a cold is another fun challenge. There’s nothing quite like that burning sensation in the lungs and throat from trying to do push-ups or a core workout when my body just wants to find the nearest horizontal surface and collapse on it.

And losing my senses of smell and taste so I can’t tell if I’m eating roast chicken or cardboard? Fantastic. In fact, it’s probably my favorite part. I’ll look forward to a dish that I’m making (or ordering) because it sounds absolutely delicious. Boy, it’s gonna make for an awesome meal…and then comes the slow, soul-draining realization that I won’t know if it’s delicious or awful. It’ll just taste like nothing. Plain ol’ nothing.

Ah well. It’s starting to clear out now. In another day or two, I’ll be back in form. The air conditioning’s been fixed and we’re regulating the water temperature. Now I just need to make it through the sweltering heat for the next 4 or 5 months. Awesome.

Conversations With A Strange Mind: Summer Sniffles

“Urgh…I hade dis stupid cold…by head feels all achey..”

“Yeah, it’s not really a fun ride for me either. Nice Stallone impression, by the way.”

“Shuddup.”

“Ouch. Guess I got the…cold shoulder!”

“Oh do…”

“Hee hee hee…I crack myself up.”

“I think you bay have beed cracked up doo bady tibes…”

“You might wanna lay off the wordplay for a while, Rocky.”

“Ughh…this is awful!”

“It sure is. How’d you go around catching a cold in summer, anyway?”

“I dot dow…stupid weather.”

“Hmm..s’pose so. But hey, look on the bright side!”

“Ad what’s dat?”

“I don’t know….I asked you to look.”

“…I’b godda go to bed.”

“Alright, but we’ve still got a – aaaand he’s gone.”

“ZzzzZZZzZZzzZZkkrrhhhh….”

“Sigh…stupid weather.”